Have You Labeled Yourself A Stepper Or Has Someone Done It For You? Back
Jun 5, 2012
When I step, I get nervous. I can’t seem to place my finger on the pulse of why that is. Most times I thinks it’s because I don’t know what to expect from a new partner and Lord knows I don’t want to look as if I don’t know what I’m doing on the hardwood. Why, because I’ve been labeled a good dancer. I’m not making that up. I’m not in my own head giving myself kudos, it’s been said to me over the years, and does making a mistake tarnish that? We all know that mistakes are inevitable, but one missed signal ladies or one bad turn men can rock us to the core. Most embarrassing social blunders make me cringe but nothing is more tortuous to my confidence than a mistake on the dance floor, I mean really. That shit messes me up. Don’t get me wrong I know that we are all prone to making mistakes, but, when they have labeled you a good dancer or heavy hitter does it make you feel as if you have to rise to the occasion every time? I know that there are those out there who are going to say, I just get out there and dance and keep it moving or I don’t dance for people I dance for me, blazeh blah blah. I beg to differ. Yeah you might get out there to do your own thing but trust and believe you know as well as I do that folks are watching you. One thing is for sure and that is those ladies and gents lining the dance floor housed at those tables perfectly positioned aren’t staring into outer space. They are looking at you and watching you dance and they are checking for you. They give you that look and steppers you know the look. It is that serious stare on their expressionless faces. Sponges, taking it all in. But keeping with the familiar can be boring. But when I get it in with a stepper unbeknownst to me and we tear that hardwood up, I then exceed my own expectations. I sashay off the dance floor with a swag so delicious that any and all labels are fitting of me, especially the one I’ve given myself, the stepper who rocks.
Label, simply a name. Is it what I call myself or is it given? Heavy hitter, great instructor, master stepper, smooth, great lead, his or her footwork is sick, awesome follower, and my favorite, he makes you look good on the dance floor. Now as a sidebar I know for a fact and you can call it what you want, but no man makes me look good. I do that all on my own. But those labels have been affixed to steppers. I have used many of them on occasion especially the proverbial good lead. Now, when Martha decided to give me the name Veronica on the morning of my birth did she have in her minds-eye this is my childs label and she must live up to the character of the woman who placed the cloth on Jesus’s forehead and wiped the sweat from his brow as he carried the cross to Calvary? I think not. But as steppers we sometimes get in a funk when we feel we need to measure up and get it right. I was given a piece of advise from a seasoned stepper once. A Chicago native with a pearl of steppn’-wisdom, backed by knowledge and experience. I welcomed it. She instructed me to never dance the same with each male lead. Change up your dance because each leader is different. I was like wow, so true, but how the heck do I do that? My footwork is alright, my basic is tight, but I live in a city where there are only about four decent leads. That is no exaggeration and I generally am able to get it in with about half of those but that’s another story for another time. Now, back to the lecture at hand… I’m not one to get caught up in the hype of the good dancer but at the same time when you are labeled something positive, you must rise. You have to perform because if you don’t that glow is going to dim and as your light goes out, so will you. Now for those who seem to think that you don’t have to live up to the hype, try heading to a set and not step. Be a marginal dancer and see what kind of response you get. You will get met with the most prominent question and that is "you don’t feel like dancing tonight” or "awe man, you usually get it in, what’s wrong? ” Now do you exploit and explain it all at the same time or just shrug it off and say on to the next as it relates to dancing and keeping it 100 with yourself?
You see a true test of character is not how we are on our best days but how we are on our worse days. When we step and slip, some of our defining steppin’ moments are ripped out from underneath us for a quick second. And when that label slips (you know the one) and falls off and lands on the hardwood do we as steppers pick it up and stick it back on our chests? Or do we leave it on the dance floor to rest and wait for the janitor to come through and toss it out?
